Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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