Too much gin, very little bucket
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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