i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
