playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
i think i scared a bird with my dick
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Randomize
