"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
