I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
He came inside me, looked me in the eye and said, "Happy Mother's Day"
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
