paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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