dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
only if we run a train.
done.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Randomize
