your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
