Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
