yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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