pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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