You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize
