I should be sponsored by Trojan
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
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