I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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