I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
i drank out of a bidet.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Randomize
