Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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