garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
I think I sprained my soul last night
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Randomize
