Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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