U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
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