i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
