Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I just blew my weed a kiss
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Randomize
