I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
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