I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
