uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
