I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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