You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
