its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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