The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
