so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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