Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
You dont lie about slip and slides
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
