I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
