Got a toothbrush?
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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