Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize
