worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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