Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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