Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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