i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
