It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
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