Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize