i barfeds in our rink
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
