Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I got her a Nickelback box set.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
