I'm really into asian looking animals
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
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