This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
