HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
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