I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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