Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
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