wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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