her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
