Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
